God's Plans

I have found this to be true, especially lately.  It seems like everything has been falling apart lately, job, relationships, friendships, everything.  But I have watched doors open lately that I thought would never open back up.  My hours at my full time job has changed and I get to volunteer at the school again (not as much as I want but it is a definite improvement!)  I have gotten a part time job where I get to serve seniors and will carry me through if my full time job falls apart.  I have some friendships that have fallen apart but looking over the friendships I do have, they have lasted for years and these people have been with me through some hard times.  I have a wonderful family support. I am talking to a wonderful guy who I can't say enough good things about.  Just when everything was falling apart, everything came together almost perfectly, and it will be perfect when His plan is completely finished.

Hope you are having a wonderful Monday!

Tired and Restless

These last few weeks have been busy, but it is mostly work stuff that I am busy with.  My full time job makes me tired. Not just physically, but mentally and spiritually also.  I work just to make someone money, and I constantly see that money mishandled and wasted and I think of everything good for others I could do with that money.  I see people take the money I bring in and live high on the cares of life and come in miserable after that money is gone and they are stressed out because they have no money.

I am tired of seeing people hurting and I can't do anything to make the pain go away. I am tired of people deliberately hurting others. I am tired of people being wrapped up in their own lives they can't give anyone else the time of day.

But on the other hand, I am restless.  I have so many ideas on how to help people that I don't know where to start.  I am working on one project that could help people tremendously if it works out like I want it too.  I am restless to do God's Will in my life and give glory and praise to Him.  I am more restless to work and serve than I ever have been in my life.  Once I got that desire doors have just been opening up to where I can serve.  I now have a part time job where I will be helping seniors. I also have the chance to volunteer regularly at the private school again!  I am so  excited about getting to be a part of my kids lives again I just can't contain it.  I get to go to the nursing home tonight.

And yet, with these opportunities, it still doesn't seem like enough.  I am not sick and tired, just tired and restless.


Hope everyone has a great week and finds somewhere they can serve!

Refreshing

Today, so far, as well as the rest of this week, has been very blah.  You know what I am talking about.  That feeling that nothing is quite right.  You are drained and tired and nothing makes sense in your life any more.  That is the feeling I have had since Saturday night.

Well I am tired of that feeling. This very moment I am starting over.  I was reading a book yesterday on refreshing yourselves so you can be more of a service to others and that is exactly what I am doing.

This moment I am grabbing a cup of hot tea, going to focus on my work, and when work is done will work on some fun rewarding projects I have going on.  I am going to church tonight and refreshing my soul and going to spend the weekend with family.

I  am going to refresh so I can help others and quit feeling so negative because  we all know that won't help anybody.

Here is the book I was talking about.  Hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

http://www.therefreshbook.com/

Encouraging Music

So this weekend, I have dealt with things that have broke my heart and I really have no words right now to describe the situation or how I am feeling. Since I have missed a couple of Tunesdays, I thought I would bring you a list of music that has helped encourage me today!

Petra - No Doubt

Casting Crowns - Praise You in This Storm

Mark Shultz  -  He Is,  Love Has Come

Selah -  Shelter Me,  He'll Hold You,  I Look to You,  You Deliver Me,  Be Thou Near to Me,

Nicole C. Mullen -  When You Call on Jesus

Mandissa -  Overcomer

Building 429 -  Fearless,  I Don't Belong

Tim Hughes -  Happy Day

Third Day -  I See Love, Cry Out to Jesus

Matthew West -  The Motions


Hope You have an encouraging Monday and if you are not then I hope this list will help you as well!!

Snow Day

So yesterday we got snow and I got sent home early from work.  So I stopped and

got enough food for two days and came home and spent the evening sewing.  I finished a very cute overnight bag which I am very proud of.  Today I don't have to go to work again so I am either going to sew some more or go clean out and organize my closet or both!!!

Be safe everyone!!!

Forgiveness

I had a whole post in my head about how we as Christians shouldn't shun people who are not like us and things like that because I feel strongly about that, and will probably still write it and save it for later. But today I have been discussing Valentine's Day and the sweetheart banquet at our church that I am expected to help put on because my Sunday School class is in charge of the food and decorations and various things like that.  I am still single (even though I am talking to someone), but that is not why I hate Valentine's Day.  I think it is a manufactured holiday that people pressure their significant others into commitments they may not be ready to make or buy expensive gifts they can't afford or get fat from chocolate, but that is a whole other soapbox to stand on another time.

I am really not looking forward to the Banquet because my ex and former best friend will be there. I feel betrayed my both of them.  Even though it has been years, since the main drama happened (they have kept it going), I still have very negative feelings toward them.  I feel like I should be over it now, but truth is every time I see them I remember how close I was to each of them and what he have now is nowhere close to what it was.

They remind me that people will hurt you to get what they want in life. They remind me that people are not always who they say they are. They remind me that people are not perfect. They remind me that people will put themselves first.  They remind me that people will lie to you.

Even with all of that, though, I have to be able to forgive and so far I am not doing well with that this last time.  There have been times when I had peace about the situation and felt like I had truly forgiven them, and then one of them would do or say something to start the drama all over again, and I begin the fight with bitterness, hurt and anger all over again.  Forgiveness is not easy for me. I feel entitled to my hurt.  I feel because they hurt me, I should be able to hurt them without consequences.

I was listening to a lesson on forgiveness, and Jesus says we must forgive others or we will not be forgiven.  And not just once but over and over and over.  I sometimes feel like they have reached their limit and I shouldn't have to forgive them anymore, but then I am reminded how many times Jesus has forgiven me and I still haven't reached a limit with Him.  And we are called as Christians to be like Him, so therefore I have to forgive without limits also.

Forgiveness is not for the other person though. It is for ourselves. The other person could honestly care less if I am upset with them or not, but it is spiritually and emotionally killing me.  I cannot do anything about what they did to me, but I can forgive and move on. I am not their judge nor do I want to be, I have to worry about myself.


So for Valentine's I am buying a fabulous dress and going to do lots of praying and soul searching.

What are your thoughts and opinions on Valentine's Day?

Wonderfully Made

My favorite verse is Psalm 139:14. It says I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.    

I love the thought that God took the time to make us individually.  The whole chapter talks about how God made us and put thought into how we would look and act.  He knows exactly where we are  all the time.  He knows our every thought, the nice and the not-so-nice ones ( I know I am not the only one who has them!)  He knows what people say to hurt us and what we say to hurt others.

He knew what we would look like because He made us that way. He knew that I would have blue eyes, brown hair, strong legs, and my momma's nose.  He knew that I would be missing a front tooth and skin that tends to break out easily or dry out or freak out for no apparent reason.  He knew I would be clumsy and would need strong bones so I didn't end up broke in a million pieces.  He knew I would tend to gain weight if I am not extremely careful and have an obsession with chocolate that must be controlled or I will be big as a barn.  He knew I would take family and friends very seriously and cannot stand people who lie, cheat or steal to get what they want.

He knew all these things about me, because He made me this way.  I have been dealing with back trouble for the last week pretty badly and have been hating my fat rolls alot more lately than normal, and I am trying to accept that some of these things I can change and some I can't.  But He knew I would be like this and He wants me to rely Him to know best and take care of me the best I can.

That means being easy on back and eating to keep my weight down and limiting the chocolate.  It means surrounding myself with people who make me feel better about myself and encourage me when I am down. It means being the best version of me and not trying to copy people I admire and trying to be them.  It means not worrying about the people who try to imitate me just annoy me.  It means immersing myself in Scripture and prayer until my thoughts are only on pure things.

Be the you He created you to be and trust Him to fill in the gaps and weaknesses you think you have!